I’m Pregnant, and My Partner is Abusive


No one should ever have to stay in a physically, emotionally, or sexually abusive relationship. You deserve to be safe. Before you do anything else, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800) 799-SAFE (7233). You can also reach them at www.thehotline.org. Our first priority is your safety.

Is Your Partner Aware You Are Pregnant?

If you haven’t shared the news with your partner because you fear the pregnancy will only make them angrier, here are a few tips if you want to tell them.

  • Make sure you are in a safe public place when you tell them.
  • Do not meet alone. Have a trusted friend, family, or clergy member with you.
  • Be aware of how far along you are in your pregnancy to confirm he is the father confidently.
  • Be prepared to answer how you intend to handle the situation.
  • Stay strong. Men often use pregnancy as a way to intimidate a woman even further.


Abuse Often Intensifies During Pregnancy or After Giving Birth

Recently, the March of Dimes presented a report on Abuse During Pregnancy. They quoted the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists as saying that more than 320,000 women are abused by their partners during their pregnancies every year.


A 2022 Harvard School of Public Health report stated, “Women in the U.S. who are pregnant or who have recently given birth are more likely to be murdered than to die from obstetric causes.” It’s called intimate partner violence(IPV), and 1 in 3 women have experienced physical, sexual, or psychological abuse from a partner during their lifetimes.


Why Does Abuse Increase During Pregnancy?

Pregnancy can be stressful, especially if it’s unplanned. Partners become more abusive at this time for some of the following reasons:

  • The partner doesn’t want the financial responsibility for children
  • They are jealous that time and attention are taken away from them
  • The pregnancy was unexpected
  • Age, marital status, race, and income often determine abuse


The Potential Outcome Of Your Pregnancy

Abuse during pregnancy can lead to any one of the following outcomes for your pregnancy and you:

  • Stillbirth
  • Pelvic Fracture
  • Fetal Injury
  • Preterm Delivery
  • Low Birth Weight
  • Placental Abruption (the placenta detaches from the uterus)
  • Death or Suicide


What Can You Do If You Are in An Abusive Relationship?

The March of Dimes says the first thing to do is recognize you are in an abusive relationship. Ask yourself some of the following questions:

  • Does my partner always put me down?
  • Has my partner caused harm or pain to my body?
  • Does my partner threaten me?
  • Does my partner always blame me?


Tell someone you trust about what you are going through. If you do not feel you have a trustworthy friend or family member, come and talk with a member of our caring medical staff. We can help you contact the Domestic Violence Hotline, refer you to a women’s home or a shelter, and see that you get proper prenatal care.


True Choice Medical Clinics is here for you because you deserve love, respect, and security. Schedule an appointment by calling us at 858-397-1970 or texting us at 858-822-9335.

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